DoS HeRmAnA's/O's

The day has come. I can't believe it!!! Here we go again with a little hope and a lot of prayers. You name it... we have DESPERATELY done it this round. From taking out two extra earrings because the prophet says only two are righteous on your temple (THIS WAS BELIEVE IT OR NOT A BIG DEAL TO ME.... apparently I'm not as mature as you all thought?!), to acupuncture, massage, energy work, family fasts, last minute vacations to relax, extra time off work and last but not least the actual sacrifice of the IVF process physically but mostly emotionally of both wife with an emphasis on HUSBAND!!

I did much better this round with my emotions. I don't know what it is about an egg retrieval and the drugs that come with it but THE PRICE IS WRONG BIOTCH! I was the epitome of a B on wheels with a small piece of humble pie that caused dams of water to be drawn from the very depths. I'm sure Ben secretly praises the heavens above that we didn't repeat that process this round.... although he may beg to differ. I am going to stick to my story, that is of course right!

We woke up this morning and headed to the University at nine for a ten o'clock transfer. I was a little nervous only because my doctor wasn't doing the transfer. Dr. Peterson, the director at the University of Utah was the man in charge this round. He did a ultrasound on me my first round and then had accidentally walked into our transfer room on our first cycle. This is the only contact we have had thus far.

They escorted me back to the transfer room with a beautiful white blanket and booties all ready for my comfort. Shortly after Dr. Petersen came in with pictures of our defrosted little muffins. He said they looked incredible. They defrosted four embryos and two survived. We signed docs for those babies to be implanted, took a high dose of valium, stirrup-ed up and back I went.

It was time. We confirmed our names and birth dates on a vial from the embryologist. The nurse did a tummy ultrasound while Dr. Petersen fed a catheter to the top of my uterus. It was crampy but the least of my worries of this process. Then on the flat screen in front of us we approved our names again and saw our babes fed into a small catheter. The embryologist brought them into our transfer room, fed them inside of the larger catheter already placed and in they went to find their new cozy home. Dr. Petersen gave the embryologist back the small catheter and he went back to the microscope to make sure those little turds ended up inside my oven. WE WERE IN BUSINESS!! The catheter was empty and two babies were implanted.

Dr. Petersen showed us where they were placed and gave us a picture of the ultrasound. He said; "for the next 30 minutes focus right here on the screen and picture those babies nestling in." As loopy as I was, THAT IS ALL I DID.... along with constant prayer! Before he left, he said; "I wish they all went that smooth." That gave me more peace of mind which is exactly what I needed.

I LOVE DOC P!!!! It was meant to be that he was our doc this time. We had such a spiritual experience with him this round. It was peaceful and reassuring that this is the right time. We told him how grateful we were to have him and he said; "No, I'm the lucky one. I get to work with the best couples in the whole world that will do anything for a family." It is the first time in months I have felt reassured that we are on the right path. Some times it is a doctor that opens up a door.

It was a fast thirty minutes and then off in a wheel chair I went to the car to three strict days of bed rest.

Humbling praying for a miracle. Blood pregnancy test scheduled for November 4th.

Arizona Weekend BUST!

This weekend was a bust! Thursday was The END of LUPRON but the start of Progesterone injections... which are ten times worse. The needles are an inch and a half long and they have to go all the way into the muscle so none of the needle is showing! BOOOOOOOO!!!!! I have dreaded this day since the last progesterone injection I received so lovingly from Ben.

We flew to Arizona Thursday morning to check out the progress on Bens 1949 Merc that is being built in Scottsdale and most importantly RELAX before we do a transfer next week. I packed my box of progesterone, needles and estrace pills. Off we went to enjoy the weekend. Thursday night at 10 PM I got out the bottle of progesterone out of the box to fill the syringe and THE FREAKIN BOTTLE WAS EMPTY!!!!! I've never had more of a heart attack in my life. For some reason I had put my empty bottle from last cycle in the box to throw it away and it never met the garbage. I called the University after hours emergency in a panic and they had the doctor on call, Dr. Moore call me back. He said everything would be fine we would just have to post pone our transfer one day and go get progesterone in the morning from another infertility clinic.

Off we went an hour across town to get a bottle of progesterone oil from the only Walgreens in Scottsdale
that carried it. I've never been so happy to spend $38 on something I already had.

It isn't anything Sprinkles Cupcakes and Gramaldi's Pizza can't fix.

Ok..... I take that back! NOTHING takes the pain away of a progesterone injection! They are hands down the worst thing invented!

Estrace + Lupron = hormonal female

Today I start 2mg of Estrace morning and night with 5 units of Lupron. Estradiol is a form of estrogen, a female sex hormone produced by the ovaries. Estrogen helps thicken and maintain the endometrial lining of the uterus.

I have enjoyed acupuncture up until this week. Now that I have been on Lupron for two weeks my patience are short and my pain tolerance is low. I feel every needle go in and it sends a shock through my body, like it hits a nerve. I try to tune out after the needles are all in and relax but this week was more difficult then normal. Lisa attached electrodes to my stomach needles to stimulate uterine lining. It is so uncomfortable! I laid there praying this cycle is successful as tears ran down my face. There is nothing like wanting something so much but having no control over it happening. I have never in my life put so much faith and trust in The Lords hands. 

I am thankful for modern medicine but what the hell happened to enjoyable sex to make a baby???